Breaking up with Buddha

This is Buddha. He lives in our bathroom. He shares it with the mouse. Knowing I am not a fan of rodents, my sweet sweet husband set a mouse trap in the kitchen for when the little guy skitters under the house to the kitchen for his midnight snack. Husband caught the mouse the first night he set the trap out. But the next morning, when he tried to move the trap, the little guy escaped. Husband suspects it was not the first time the little guy has spent time in the little trap. We've left the trap out every night since. Oh rather my husband has, because I am such a sissy, I don't even want to touch the trap.

The mouse seems to be a smart fellow as he hasn't made any other forays into the trap (probably he was a lab rat in a former life). I now think our problem is actually the Buddha who lives in the bathroom with the mouse. I think he has to go.

Since Buddha doesn't like violence or killing of any living thing, I think the Buddha is on the mouse's side. I had a few words with Buddha. Mainly, that I didn't wish any harm or killing to befall the mouse. I just want the mouse to live somewhere else.

Buddha statues generally have long ear lobes to signify long life, but this Buddha has long ear lobes to signify his stellar hearing. I think he heard the neighbor telling me how he caught a rat in his house. After letting his kids play with it, he drowned it in a bucket of water.

Last night when I went into the bathroom, the mouse was dangling by his feet from the rafter, exposing his belly before dropping down and scampering over to the Buddha. Buddha probably told him not to worry, that he only had another week with us in the house.

I'm also losing the battle against the mosquitoes. Last night one was caught under the mosquito netting over our bed. Husband and baby emerged this morning completely unscathed. I, however, looked like I had come down with the chicken pox.
"Wow." Kent said looking at my hundreds of bites, "thanks for taking one for the team."

I blame this on the Buddha as well. I like Buddha and I like what he stands for, but, like the mouse, I think it's best for both of us to spend some time apart. Just until I get rid of the creatures I don't like.